If you’ve read many of my posts, you know that one of the hardest parts of moving to Florida wasn’t unpacking boxes or learning my way around a new town.
It was starting over socially.
Besides one wonderful friend I met through a Facebook post, I really didn’t know anyone. As someone who is naturally shy and introverted, making new friends doesn’t happen easily for me. I’ve never been the person who can walk into a room full of strangers and strike up conversations without a second thought.
So when my friend decided to start a local Facebook group for singles, with the goal of bringing people together for dinners and activities, she encouraged me to join.
I said yes.
Then I immediately wondered if I’d made a mistake.
The first event was dinner at a local restaurant, and for days beforehand my mind did what anxious minds do best. What if everyone already knew each other? What if I had nothing interesting to say? What if there were awkward silences? What if I just… didn’t fit in?
If my friend hadn’t been going too, I’m almost certain I would have found an excuse to stay home.
Even with her there, I almost talked myself out of it.
Why Social Events Feel Hard for Me
I’ve always been the quiet one.
I prefer one-on-one conversations to large groups, and I usually need time to warm up before I feel comfortable. Small talk has never been my strength, and I have a tendency to replay conversations afterward, wondering if I said the wrong thing or sounded awkward.
Being shy isn’t just about being quiet. Sometimes it’s carrying around a constant stream of “what ifs” that other people never even notice.
It’s exhausting.
The Comfort of Having One Familiar Face
Thankfully, my friend lives only about five minutes away, so we drove to the restaurant together.
That simple act of walking in beside someone I already knew made all the difference.
Sometimes courage doesn’t mean doing something completely alone.
Sometimes it means accepting a little support while you do something that still feels scary.
Walking Into the Restaurant
This particular restaurant is entirely outdoors, overlooking the river. We got there a little early and sat on a bench by the entrance, trying to identify other attendees based on their social media profile pictures.
One by one, everyone arrived.
There ended up being just five of us, which turned out to be the perfect size.
As we pulled our chairs together around the table, I felt myself relax just a little.
What Actually Happened
And then something funny happened.
Nothing.
Nothing terrible.
Nothing awkward.
No one judged me.
No one expected me to be the loudest person at the table.
We ordered dinner, shared stories, laughed more than I expected, and spent a couple of hours simply enjoying each other’s company.
At one point, we even spotted a manatee swimming in the river beside us, followed later by an alligator. It felt like such a Florida moment that we all stopped talking to watch.
By the time dinner was over, I realized I’d spent far more time laughing than worrying.
What the Night Taught Me
I’ve realized that fear has a way of making possibilities seem much scarier than reality.
The hardest part wasn’t introducing myself.
It wasn’t making conversation.
It wasn’t even walking into the restaurant.
The hardest part was deciding not to stay home.
That’s often how courage works.
It isn’t loud or dramatic.
Sometimes courage is simply getting dressed, getting in the car, and walking through the door even when every part of you wants to cancel.
The Bigger Reflection
If I want to build a life here in Florida, I can’t wait until I feel completely confident.
I have to be willing to feel a little uncomfortable.
I’m still shy.
I still overthink.
Large groups will probably never be my favorite thing.
But that dinner reminded me of something I hope I don’t forget:
Connection doesn’t usually happen inside our comfort zones.
Sometimes growth doesn’t look like becoming a different person.
Sometimes it looks like being exactly who you are… and showing up anyway.
💌 Your Turn
Have you ever almost talked yourself out of doing something that ended up being worth it?
I’d love to hear your story in the comments.
If you’re ready to take your own gentle first step, I’d love to invite you to subscribe to my newsletter. You will receive a free download of my 5-Day Self-Care Reset Plan. It’s a simple way to start making space for yourself again, in just five minutes a day.
Feel free to visit my Etsy shop for resources to help you on your journey. I also have a free private self-care interactive Facebook group for women that you can join here.
Follow me on socials:
Leave a Reply